Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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