i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
