Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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