We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
