I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I need moral support for this bender
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
