I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
We just shotgunned beers for America
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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