this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
