considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
