Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
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