don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
