Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
