She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
