Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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