I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
