Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
