i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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