she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize