I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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