Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
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