NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
