im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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