As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
