yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
