we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
this must be what syphilis tastes like
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize
