remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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