break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
