wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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