I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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