who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
People in love make me want to vomit
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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