Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
