A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize