Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Randomize
