Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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