I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
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