school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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