his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
