You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
