another moral hangover. fuck.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
We had sex on a dog bed..
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
