Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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