I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
the liver wants what the liver wants
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
