Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Randomize
