thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
