I need help removing her.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
