worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
