And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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