North Korea, Best Korea!
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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