Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
