The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I love how my cats smell like pot.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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