New invention idea: vibrating tampons
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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