I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
