My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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