If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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