Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Randomize
